Ends Up in Hospital
In a new case study, Irish doctors report the baffling case of a 33-year-old man who injected his own semen intravenously for a year and a half, a self-developed “cure” intended to treat his chronic back pain. It does not appear to have worked.
After reportedly injecting semen into his arm every month for 18 months, the man finally sought medical attention—but not for his arm. The patient instead complained of “severe, sudden onset lower pack pain,” having lifted a “heavy steel object” three days beforehand. During his checkup, the doctor found a patch of red swelling on his right forearm, after which the man admitted he’d been injecting himself with his own semen using a hypodermic needle he purchased online.
This time around, he had injected three “doses” of semen, entering both his blood vessels and his muscles.
“This is the first reported case of semen injection for use as a medical treatment,” the doctors at Adelaide and Meath Hospital in Ireland wrote in the case study, titled “‘Semenly’ Harmless Back Pain: An Unusual Presentation of a Subcutaneous Abscess,” published in the Irish Medical Journal.
The swollen region grew and hardened around the area on his arm where he’d injected his semen, and an x-ray revealed an area of trapped air beneath the man’s skin. The doctors immediately hospitalized the patient, treating him with an intravenous antimicrobial therapy. After the patient’s back pain improved, he discharged himself.
The doctors performed a search of the medical literature and beyond, revealing not a single case of intravenous semen injection for back pain. According to the case study:
Although there is a report of the effects of subcutaneous semen injection into rats and rabbits, there were no cases of intravenous semen injection into humans found across the literature. A search of more eclectic internet sites and forums found no other documentation of semen injection for back pain treatment or other uses. Attempts at intravenous and arterial injection of harmful substances such as mercury, gasoline, charcoal lighter fluid, hydrochloric acid and hydrocarbon are well described and are generally carried out in attempted suicide as opposed to the case detailed above in which the patient was aiming to relieve physical discomfort.
After dutifully reporting the first ever case of a man injecting himself with his own semen to try to treat his back pain, the authors offered a warning: It’s dangerous for the untrained to perform intravenous injections on themselves, especially when they’re injecting things that aren’t supposed to be injected into veins, like semen.
This isn’t the first time we’ve seen something… like this. Perhaps this case reminds you of Aaron Traywick, the deceased biohacker who once gave himself an unregulated herpes treatment in front of a crowd.
The doctors behind the new case study note that the semen-injecting patient demonstrates the risks of experimenting on yourself prior to safety-assessed clinical research.
I DO NOT EVEN WANT TO KNOW WHERE THE SAMPLES CAME FROM. (EXCUSE THE PUN)