SATIRE POST OF THE DAY: SOCIAL MEDIA WARNINGS

SATIRE POST OF THE DAY: SOCIAL MEDIA WARNINGS


Social Media Companies Remind Users They Can Be Banned

Saying Anything False Or Anything Too True

Social media companies have for some time been trying to control what people say on their platforms to make sure those platforms can’t be used to harm others — or at least not Democrats. A number of those companies have now gotten together and released a statement clarifying what social media users are allowed to say on the internet.

“Sure, we don’t want users saying false things,” said Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg at a press conference, “at least not about certain things and certain people. But the really dangerous stuff is not false information but information that is just too true to the point that it’s disruptive.”

“Yeah, basic true things like ‘It’s sunny outside’ are fine,” said Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey, “but true things about really important topics — you need to avoid those. Like we don’t care how true your information is about dealing with the pandemic or where the virus may have come from. You need to stick to what we’ve said you’re allowed to say. Be too truthful, and it’s off to Parler for you.”


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DIPSHIDIOT FORMER DEPUTY CONVICTED OF PLANTING DRUGS

DIPSHIDIOT FORMER DEPUTY CONVICTED OF PLANTING DRUGS

Dashcam image of Deputy Zachary Wester

Former Florida deputy guilty of planting drugs in stopped cars

Zachary Wester denies any wrongdoing

A former Florida sheriff’s deputy whose patrol car was found to contain a stash of narcotics was convicted Tuesday of planting drugs during traffic stops.

A Jackson County jury found fired deputy Zachary Wester guilty on 19 of 67 total counts, including racketeering, official misconduct, fabricating evidence, perjury, false imprisonment and possession of controlled substances and drug paraphernalia, according to the Tallahassee Democrat. Jackson County is located in the Florida Panhandle, northwest of Tallahassee.

Internal affairs investigators found the drugs hidden inside Wester’s patrol car in the summer of 2018, shortly before he was suspended. Prosecutors say it was ready-to-plant evidence that Wester used during his traffic stops.

Wester was charged in 2019 in connection with a dozen traffic stops where he arrested drivers and passengers. Prosecutors had to drop charges in nearly 120 cases involving Wester that occurred between 2016 and 2018 because of the accusations that he planted evidence.


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AMAZON BUYING MGM STUDIOS

AMAZON BUYING MGM STUDIOS


Amazon to buy MGM Studios for $8.45 billion

Amazon said Wednesday it will acquire MGM Studios for $8.45 billion, marking its boldest move yet into the entertainment industry and turbocharging its streaming ambitions.

The deal is the second-largest acquisition in Amazon’s history, behind its $13.7 billion purchase of Whole Foods in 2017.

Amazon said it hopes to leverage MGM’s storied filmmaking history and wide-ranging catalog of 4,000 films and 17,000 TV shows to help bolster Amazon Studios, its film and TV division.

“The real financial value behind this deal is the treasure trove of IP in the deep catalog that we plan to reimagine and develop together with MGM’s talented team,” said Mike Hopkins, senior vice president of Prime Video and Amazon Studios. “It’s very exciting and provides so many opportunities for high-quality storytelling.”

DAWG SAYS: I GUESS BEZOS IS TRYING TO OVERTAKE BILL GATES IN THE MULTI BILLIONAIRE CATEGORY


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