I never believed in making my bed.

It turns out, I was right all along.

People love that expression “You’ve made your bed, now lie in it.” But you never hear its corollary: “You’ve lain in your bed, now make it.”

If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s sleeping in beds. I was a shoo-in for an Olympic Sleeping medal in 1980, a chance I lost when the United States boycotted the games in Moscow. All that training, all those long, sleepful nights, all for naught.

What I’m not so good at is making a bed. From the moment I left the crib, making a bed struck me as a wasted effort. Why make a bed when you’re only going to have to unmake it that night?

So, like Galileo, my once-heretical views have been proven correct. It turns out I was right all along.


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